So Much To Be Answered

Here I am once again. It is about 3:40 at night. Well I should say early morning now haha. Well anyway you now know quite a bit for just the start of my blogs but now here I am writing more. Soon at about 6:45 pm on this very Thursday I will be getting my very first piercing done. Actually I will be getting two done as a matter of fact. I will be getting my tongue done, and my right eyebrow done. Pretty sick don't you think so cause I would say so myself haha. You may think I am doing it because everyone else is or even my own friends are doing it. The truth is really I just wanted it for myself. True that my friends have piercings, and I did ask them about it because I wanted information on what it's like but it's not like it's a secret cult so many people have done it for centuries, and I wanted to know the experience. I'm actually quite excited to get them. I feel like it will bring my inner self out. It's a way of expressing yourself, and as do Tattoo's as well which I also want to get. I got some great ideas for those actually.

What I really want to know is why my own father is so afraid of me getting these? All he says is that people will never hire me because of my image, and other people will just judge me for it. It's like all he cares is about what other people think of me. Why should he care about other people. I'm his flesh, and blood. I came from him. If I had my own son or daughter I would defend them even if it's my own family insulting them. I've always felt like he never really appreciated me in some ways. I feel like he wanted me to be a different person like he wanted me to be exactly like him. I'm sure you have all felt the same way about your own parents as well. Not all parents are perfect but when you are a child you do learn from their mistakes, and you take what you learn from them, and involve it to something much greater. If my son wants Piercings, and Tattoos go for it. I will be there with him or her when they get their first one.

I want to love my child so much. I want them to be able to talk to me, and at least say some great things about me. I want them to be able to rely on me, and be able to actually speak to me if they are lonely, sad, depressed or anything really. I want them to have a life, and have strong emotions like me so that they are free , and know that they always have me by their side. I want to be the best father in the world. I want them to be able to hear it from their own mouths when they say it. I will even shed a tear hopefully if I feel it but I know deep down I will be crying with joy. I just hope that they have a wonderful mother who loves me for who I am as well, and the children. It's so weird that i'm thinking about this so far ahead when I haven't even made love to a woman or even had a girlfriend of that matter, and i'm only 20 years old to top it off. I just want my family I guess. I just want to start it. Maybe the party man is gonna end soon. Who knows really life is a mystery.

Finally I feel like maybe I going somewhere with stuff. I feel like I can take on the world. Once this is done tomorrow I will feel like a new person. They say that Piercings can open you up to a whole new world of things deep inside. Same with Tattoos. What I want for a Tattoo right now is a Slayer Tattoo on my upper back. It's right awesome if you saw the design of it. I want also a DragonBall Z Tattoo. I was thinking of either the Z logo on my right shoulder or Super Saiyan 3 Goku on my shoulder. I think I might go with SSJ3 Goku it seemed so much cooler. That's just my inner nerd calling out to me. God I love being a nerd lol. Anyway as I will continue it's hard to say where all things are going. I know that at the end of the summer I will be in Fredricton with Tammy who you all have heard so much about. It's gonna be awesome being roommates with her. She always brightens my day. I think finally some things will be answered though about my Dad. I just hope they all go well but I can't expect much until it actually happens. I'm praying though but until then I bid you a fair well, and goodnight to all :)

Tammy Dawn Meade A True Friend To Me

You have been just keeping me so positive in my life. You I consider one of the best people I have ever met in my entire life as I believe you think the same of me. You are filled with so much passion, and love that I cannot describe to begin how amazing you are. With you I can talk about anything or any problem I have. When I am close to you I feel strength, and the power to live. You have made me into a so much better person, and the way you are around other people truly amazes me most times. So kind, gentle, and full of so much life. I have felt we truly made a strong connection with one an other. Tammy Dawn Meade you are the most amazing friend I have ever had. No one can replace you, and you will never be replace. You make my life so happy without you I am nothing. Our friendship is truly strong, and will always be strong no matter the out come.

Always you have been through my troubles even when i'm down, stress, freaking out, crying you hugged me, and kept me safe from whatever I had going on in my troubled mind. Your the reason why I am strong, and confident, and you a gift from above, and as maybe believe the same. You are my inspiration, and my Idol. Whenever I see you, and your child it always brings joy into my life. Not only did you open a door of friendship into my life but you opened up a door to which we created a family. A family of where I felt I would never be hurt or suffer. A family that would be there for me whenever I would be needed. Tammy you are so amazing to me. You are truly a great friend, and a golden star to me. Whenever you are happy go lucky or having the time of your life I always have fun to. You always brighten my day with your presence.

Your son Joesph, and you mean so much to me, and you are such a great mother, and your son will be a great person when he gets older because he will learn so much from you. Tammy just remember this, and remember everything we talk about, and that your life means so much to me. Everything we have been through these few months were not for nothing. They were for something so much greater. They were meant for a future of happiness, and a true friendship that will live for decades to come.

It was so amazing on how fast we became friends, and just how amazing you just opened up to me. I didn't think of you on how you would open up to me. Then when you said you were my best friend I felt truly honor, and that I to felt the same way. It's like fate made us to become friends. Fate brought us to be the bestest friends in the world. We made that happen though. We worked hard on our friendship, and made us to what we are today, and I truly believe you are the best person in the world. I don't care what any other person says  about you. If they say your a horrible person I believe they are wrong. Cause I've gotten to know you, and you are the best person I have ever met in my life. They just are Jealous of you, and what great friends you have. I'm greatful to have you, and this is how much you mean to me Tammy. I luv you always, and nothing will ever change that :)